the essay is already written but i need some things to be changed and edited. the first three paragraphs are already corrected by the teacher but they are not edited, so i need them to be edited just how the teacher wants them to, i will attach the correction of the teacher and i want the other paragraphs to be edited the same way because thats how she wants them. the essay should be flowing smoothly and the paragraphs should be connected, like each topic sentence should say how it is connected to the other.
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